So here I am getting ready to leave bright and early tomorrow morning for Inman Connect 2008, but the logistics, as they say, they are a’daunting. Kris Berg has noted the same — twice, in fact.
Determined to bring break the lazy habit I have of stuffing a big suitcase to the gills with everything I think I may need, I’ve decided to downsize and make do with a carry-on suitcase plus the inevitable laptop bag. Problem is, that means my toiletries kit will be going through that all-seeing conveyor belt Cyclops run by the TSA. Now that could be embarrassing.
Even worse, it seems all my “liquids, gels, and aerosols” have to be 3-ounce sizes or less AND fit in a one-quart ziplock bag. Not just any clear plastic bag, mind you; no — a ziplock bag. (Makes you wonder: Did Michael Chertoff just buy some S. C. Johnson stock?)
And so I head out to the local convenience store, and 15 minutes later I walk out with only:
- One Gillette Clear Gel deodorant, weighing in a 3.0 ounces. Phew.
- Box of 20 Ziplock (r) bags. Oh no. Just noticed they’re 1/2 gallon bags, which, if my knowledge of the antiquated measuring system foisted on us by our former colonizers and still in use in this country (despite having wisely dropped the u in colour and shifted the r and e in center) is correct, means I’ll have to either a) re-engineer one of the bags or b) head back to said convenience store or c) take my chances tomorrow morning.
Apparently 3 ounces is a really small amount! (Where I grew up, also a former British colony, they used the smorgasboard approach to ingesting silly British-isms: take some, leave the rest. They drive on the right, unlike the Brits. They use Metric measurements, like the Brits — not English ones, like the Yanks. They spell color colour and center centre. I have no frame of reference for “3 ounces.”) Convenience stores simply don’t have 3-ounce sizes of shaving cream, toothpaste, and the other toiletry sundries.
Off to the nearest Longs, a 10 minute drive away. 10 more minutes of futile looking, before finally breaking down and doing the unmanly thing: asking for directions. Turns out what I’m looking for is not travel size but sample size.
Finally, I’m ready to go.
Now if I can just find a way to smuggle some kunu on board. I don’t think Michael Chertoff has a specific ruling on that!
Tags: Inman, Inman Connect 2008, Inman-Connect
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